Another new year.......

So it's another new year. Another year I rang in alone. Another year that I had no midnight kiss, no one to look forward to the new year with. It's officially a long time single. I don't remember my last true honest to goodness date. You know the kind, where I get an invitation to dinner, movie or to just hang out. Oh wait I take that back I had ONE of those over the summer, and it was a double date with dip shit chicken wanker young pup.

I signed up and PAID for a new site last week. We will see, but so far I'm NOT seeing it as very promising.

This potential site is supposedly supposed to link me up with more "like minded guys."

So far most of these "like minded guys" reside in areas well more than an hour away. I've said it before, I'm sure but just in case.... I'm not moving. My family is here, I have a really good job here and it would be a hard battle to find one comparible anywhere else. I've spent the last several years setting up what I do as a second job, investing and building a customer base. I like it here, I was raised here, my son is in a good school. These are just some of the reasons. I wouldn't mind moving 30 minutes tops away, but I would really like to keep my son in the same school district he's in now. 

I know it's selfish to say I won't move but I can't help it. I know that most of these guys are in the same situation. I know how I feel so I really don't want to ask them to enter into anything even the begginning stages of a relationship knowing that ultimately if it worked someone would have to make a tough decision. I don't want to ask them to make that decision. It would be much easier if I could meet and link up with someone more local.

I still want to be persued. I'll put myself out there to a certain point. But I want a strong willing man to reach out and persue me. I've tried to persue and I don't like it. I guess part of me wants that man to prove early on that they WANT to know me, WANT to spend time with me because of who I am including all my edginess and faults.